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		<title>Sangeeta (संगीता)</title>
		<link>https://www.nilanjananandy.com/sangeeta-%e0%a4%b8%e0%a4%82%e0%a4%97%e0%a5%80%e0%a4%a4%e0%a4%be/</link>
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		<dc:creator><![CDATA[admin]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sat, 15 May 2021 17:31:36 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[People, Places and Me]]></category>
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					<description><![CDATA[Sangeeta (संगीता) गीता -Sangeeta was मधुबाला- Madhubala before she got married. There is this tradition of changing the girl’s name by would be in-laws according to the alphabet the priest suggests at the time of marriage. In one of the conversations, ललिता -Lalita (Bhuri kaki’s youngest daughter in law who was प्रेमलता- Premalata before her [&#8230;]]]></description>
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			<h2 class="elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default">Sangeeta (संगीता)</h2>		</div>
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					<div class="elementor-text-editor elementor-clearfix"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">गीता</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> -Sangeeta was </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">मधुबाला</span><span style="font-weight: 400;">&#8211; Madhubala before she got married. There is this tradition of changing the girl’s name by would be in-laws according to the alphabet the priest suggests at the time of marriage.</span></p><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">In one of the conversations, </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">ललिता</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> -Lalita (Bhuri kaki’s youngest daughter in law who was </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">प्रेमलता</span><span style="font-weight: 400;">&#8211; Premalata before her marriage) mentioned that it is considered to be auspicious to have names according to the alphabet suggested by the priest. While the parents of a girl may do that at the time of the birth, the in-laws make sure they do it again at the time of marriage so that there is enough compatibility between the couple. She also mentioned how marriage transforms a girl; she becomes part of another family, which will eventually be her family and her identity. So, changing the name is a kind of reinforcement of those changes.</span></p><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Coming back to Sangeeta, she is thirty, thirty-two years old. Again, it is based on the information in the bank account. She has no idea what her name means whether Sangeeta or Madhubala. She heads the Dinanath Self Help Group (SHG) in Kharveda along with Kachri. She has studied till class 5 in her primary years. Confident and fun loving, Sangeeta loves to talk. Mother of three &#8211; eldest Heena, her daughter got married few days before I first met her. The other two are Akshit and Dharmesh, school going boys, eleven or twelve years old. Her husband, mother-in-law and father-in-law all work in Ahmedabad at the construction sites. They visit her during the festivals and the harvesting season. It is in the city that Sangeeta watched her first movie” </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">मैंने</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">प्यार</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">किया</span><span style="font-weight: 400;">” – Maine pyar kiya. She is a great admirer of Salman Khan especially because of his </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">बॉडी</span><span style="font-weight: 400;">&#8211; baady ( body). The other day I was wondering how Sangeeta would react to the news of her favourite hero going to jail and then managed to get out of it as well; how will she react to the various charges on her idol; whether she will be able to maintain righteousness while reacting to this context. Next time I visit Kharveda, I would love to speak to her about it. Or maybe I should call her one of these days.</span></p><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">For that matter, what, how, when, which version of a news reaches these far-flung villages and how it is understood is worth thinking about. I clearly remember daughter of Kachri from Semalia asking me about the December 16th, 2012 Nirbhaya rape case and how most of them feel Delhi to be an unsafe rather a bad place to be in because girls get raped over there. Yes, Delhi is unsafe but then this is not the only thing to know.</span></p></div>
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					<div class="elementor-text-editor elementor-clearfix"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Besides Salman Khan, Gopi bahu (from a daily soap) is another favourite of Sangeeta. Narrating an incident where she helped a family member to give up his drinking habits, she proudly mentioned, it was her favourite- Gopi bahu from whom she got inspiration to unconditionally love one’s family. She even went to a zoo in the city and remembers </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">गेण्डा</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> –genda– Rhinoceros and was feeling excited like a child. At home she loves </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">मिठू</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> -Mithu, the parrot. And felt animals like cows, buffaloes are common in villages; they are part of the family so the notion of favourite animal or bird is difficult for her to understand. Yellow is her favourite colour. While she was not able to remember the word </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">पीला</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> –peela meaning yellow, she pointed at the marigold outside her house. Later showed some of her yellow saris as well. She loves wearing danglers or longs earrings-</span><span style="font-weight: 400;">लम्बी</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">लम्बी</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">झुमकी</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> lambi lambi jhumki. In fact, one day we exchanged earrings to see how it looks… then she mentioned how every ten fifteen days she would change her earrings and often commented on my dressing, jewellery etc. </span></p></div>
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					<div class="elementor-text-editor elementor-clearfix"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">In fact, she was showing me the kind of cosmetics, undergarments available in Partapur. She even said how complicated it is to wear sari and work in fields. While working they have to constantly take care of the </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">पल्लू</span><span style="font-weight: 400;">&#8211; pallu… to cover their head. Otherwise, the elders in the village criticize. Enacting the posture, she said waist and other body parts like cleavage, hands etc gets exposed in a sari when they are cutting crops, picking fodder etc. She loves using perfumes and has got two three different ones. Fond of cooking she makes lot of different things. she loves eating ladies’ fingers- </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">भिन्डी</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">की</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">सब्जी</span><span style="font-weight: 400;">. Sangeeta is good at stitching.  Often, she would do that. She even showed the wall she painted for her daughter’s wedding.</span></p></div>
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					<div class="elementor-text-editor elementor-clearfix"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">When asked, she wasn’t sure whether she would like to become a woman in her next birth. She said while she would love to but men have more freedom </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">मर्दों</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">को</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">ज़्यादा</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">छूंट</span><span style="font-weight: 400;">  </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">है</span><span style="font-weight: 400;">   – mardon ko zyaada choont hai. Even if it is a man’s fault, everyone blames the woman. Even women themselves blame another woman. She feels though men are stronger(physically), they earn livelihood, a woman can be persistent in her ways, </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">वह</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">चाहे</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">तो</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">उसको</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">अपने</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">इशारे</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">पे</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">नचा</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">सकती</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">है</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> –woh chahe to usko apne ishaare pe nacha sakti hain. While she was discussing all this, she felt being single I won’t be able to grasp such undercurrents between the sexes.</span></p></div>
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					<div class="elementor-text-editor elementor-clearfix"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Sangeeta is a bundle of energy. Often, she would tell me different things about her village – facts, gossip, scandals, all. She was very enthusiastic the day children of the village gathered to draw and share their stories with each other. However, she feels they need to do more especially the women in the SHG. During the five weeks that I spent interacting with the women in Kharveda, Sangeeta was the only one who used to ask me what the other artists were doing in other villages and how the women in those villages were reacting.</span></p></div>
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		<title>Babli devi (बब्बू -Babbu)</title>
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		<dc:creator><![CDATA[admin]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 14 Feb 2021 06:31:49 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[People, Places and Me]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.nilanjananandy.com/?p=1480</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[Babli devi (बब्बू -Babbu) Babli devi (देवी), fondly called बब्बू (Babbu) by all including me, lives in the same village Kharveda, where Bhuri kaki lives. She doesn’t know the meaning of her name. When asked it didn’t make much difference to her. She said she must be thirty, thirty-five years old or maybe forty. Not sure, Babbu said “पहले तो [&#8230;]]]></description>
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					<div class="elementor-text-editor elementor-clearfix"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Babli devi </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">(</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">देवी</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">)</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">, fondly called </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">बब्बू</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> (</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Babbu)</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> by all including me, lives in the same village Kharveda, where Bhuri kaki lives. She doesn’t know the meaning of her name. </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">When </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">asked</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> it didn’t make much difference to her</span><span style="font-weight: 400;">. She</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> said she must be thirty, thirty-five years old or maybe forty. Not sure, Babbu said </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">“</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">पहले</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">तो</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">बारह</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">पंद्रह</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">साल</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">में</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">ही</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">शादी</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">हो</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">जाती</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">थी</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">, </span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">कोई</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">पूँछता</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">थोड़ी</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">न</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">था</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> …” (earlier child marriage was common, rather it was the norm. No one used to ask the child for consent</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">).</span></p><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Fond of the colours </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">Red</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> and </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">White,</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> she feels </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">White</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> looks good on her. Roses are her most favourite, though not much available in her village or nearby </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">market</span><span style="font-weight: 400;">. I love all kind of jewellery but the anklets are my favourite. Showing the one she was wearing, Babbu mentioned that this is artificial </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">(imitation- a word popularly used for jewellery other than gold or silver</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">)</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">. She</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> has silver anklets as well mostly worn during festivals, weddings or other such </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">occasions. She</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> puts</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">bindi, sindoor, wears sari </span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">during festivals and weddings </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">and</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> also when she visits her parent’s place.</span></p><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">She loves eating wheat bread and lentils </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">(</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">गेहू</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">की</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">रोटी</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">और</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">दाल</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">की</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">सब्जी</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">अच्छू</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">लागे</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">).</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> </span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">In her free </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">time, she listens to music, however doesn’t understand the Hindi wordings.</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> She recollects a </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Vaagri</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> song where the bride’s mother abuses the son-in-law in a jovial manner, like a joke. Other than this, a short trip to Partapur especially to the </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">local</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> market is common in the region. Babbu feels, if one has enough </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">money then one</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> can go to different places.</span></p><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">She says it’s okay if we don’t know something but we can always </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">discuss things</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> freely.  </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">(this she mentioned when one of the women from the village felt what will they talk about since I am from a city, and educated; they are in the village, most of them have not even been to schools)</span></i></p><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">She tries doing all her work and doesn’t care much about what she likes or dislikes; bending a little towards me, she says, </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">“</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">अपना</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">काम</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">तो</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">करवू</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">पड़े</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">उसमे</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">क्या</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">शर्म</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">“</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">.</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> Whenever she remembers something, immediately finishes that particular task. Now she is so used to doing her household chores, that even when taking a break or sitting idle, she keeps thinking about the pending work. I realized the whole time she was cleaning the wheat grains while talking to me.</span></p><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Babbu loves to be within herself. </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">Working in</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> the farms, household chores like cooking, washing etc keeps her occupied all the time. Neither does she speaks rudely, or something offensive to others nor does </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">she enjoys going to other people’s</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> house</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> (for chit chatting, gossiping etc)</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">. She mentions that some women speak very rudely and fight with their husbands all the time. </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">Somehow, she</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> doesn’t </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">support</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> that.</span></p><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">When asked about being courageous or fearless she said it requires courage to give </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">birth to babies and raise them</span><span style="font-weight: 400;">, pay back loans, do all kinds of work at </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">home and in the</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> fields- to run the house, to survive. Babbu often feels she has many thoughts which she is not able to express properly. </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">She says,</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> “</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">विचा</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">र</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">तो</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">आता</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">हैं</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">, </span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">सोचते</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">तो</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">हैं</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">, </span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">पर</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">होंसला</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">नहीं</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">मिलता</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">, </span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">हिम्मत</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">नहीं</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">रहती</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">I </span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">बोलते</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">तो</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">भी</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">नहीं</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">सुनते</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> I </span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">“</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">.</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> She feels her husband can express </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">rather speak better </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">(mainly because he works in a big city like Mumbai).</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> </span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Hesitant and </span><span style="font-weight: 400;">shy, she mentions with a smile</span><span style="font-weight: 400;">, she doesn’t know how to sit with her husband, share some good moments, speak beautifully but yes, over the years has developed a strong friendship with him.</span></p></div>
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